Match Director's Blog
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Dave Weighs in on The Clone Wars, Now That It's Too Late
In sheer story-telling terms, maybe the Clone Wars are best left in the past. Unexplored. Undisturbed. As a piece of dark history, a reference to former greatness, the Clone Wars were fascinating.
PRINCESS LEIA: Years ago you served my father in the Clone Wars.
DAVE: Cool. I wonder what that's all about?
As a flesh and blood prequel, tv show, book, video game and screensaver, the Clone Wars are crap. Maybe it’s just the execution – we'll never know - it never had a chance to stay in the dark because of the big mega-load shit-ton of money to be made. How long can the precepts of story resist that kind of cash? Current estimates put the value of the Star Wars franchise at a skillion dollars. What human being could resist?
Hence Jar-Jar. ¶ 1:01 PM 0 comments links to this post
PRINCESS LEIA: Years ago you served my father in the Clone Wars.
DAVE: Cool. I wonder what that's all about?
As a flesh and blood prequel, tv show, book, video game and screensaver, the Clone Wars are crap. Maybe it’s just the execution – we'll never know - it never had a chance to stay in the dark because of the big mega-load shit-ton of money to be made. How long can the precepts of story resist that kind of cash? Current estimates put the value of the Star Wars franchise at a skillion dollars. What human being could resist?
Hence Jar-Jar. ¶ 1:01 PM 0 comments links to this post
Saturday, January 10, 2009
A Holiday Story
I had a busy fall. I spent a month on Martha's Vineyard in a cottage with no heat, working days on an indy horror movie, holding the boom pole over my head, watching the director shout instructions like "Fear! Fear! Panic! Scream! Smile! You suck! Your boyfriend's dying!" then I came back to the city to resume my work in tv and commercial production, which consists largely of driving the director around the city until 4 in the morning, from bar to bar, so he can play his guitar in front of a live audience. Oh yes. 4 a.m. I also bought him socks.
But the best story I've heard on set this season was told to me by a fellow PA named Kevin. Kevin works in production for the money, has no aspirations to direct, and in fact does the job only to pay the rent and to afford an occasional night out with his girlfriend. Kevin is an imposing figure, 6'3", 250. Heart of gold, but very no-nonsense. In his own words:
KEVIN: So I'm working this job, and the Production Coordinator comes up to me and says, 'Kevin, you have to walk this dog. It's the agency dog. The client is very adamant that the dog gets walked five times a day. It needs to be walked now.' I look at her and I say 'fine.' I figure, I'll take a break, walk the dog around the block, visit the park, have a smoke, take my time, no problem.
'And,' the Coordinator says, 'you have to pick up it's crap.'
DAVID: And?
KEVIN: And I said 'I'm not doing that.' And she says 'You have to do it. It's the law.'
DAVID: So? Did you do it?
KEVIN: I didn't. And here's why. If I pick up that dog's crap, I will be known for the rest of my life as 'the guy who is willing to pick up that dog's crap.' I am not that guy. Not for a dog that I don't know personally. If it was my dog, fine, that's the law in New York, you pick up after your dog, but I'm not picking up this spoiled puppy's doo doo, I don't want to be that guy.
DAVID: I don't blame you.
KEVIN: But that wasn't the best part. The best part was this other PA wannabe director was standing right behind me, the words weren't even out of my mouth, when he jumps in with 'I'll do it!' and goes off and happily picks up the agency dog's crap for the rest of the afternoon.
DAVID: No kidding.
KEVIN: They will always ask you to do something terrible, and the terribleness will expand exponentially until you draw the line. You draw the line too early, you're out of a job. You draw it too late, you have no soul left. Balance, Dave. It's the only way. ¶ 3:11 PM 0 comments links to this post
But the best story I've heard on set this season was told to me by a fellow PA named Kevin. Kevin works in production for the money, has no aspirations to direct, and in fact does the job only to pay the rent and to afford an occasional night out with his girlfriend. Kevin is an imposing figure, 6'3", 250. Heart of gold, but very no-nonsense. In his own words:
KEVIN: So I'm working this job, and the Production Coordinator comes up to me and says, 'Kevin, you have to walk this dog. It's the agency dog. The client is very adamant that the dog gets walked five times a day. It needs to be walked now.' I look at her and I say 'fine.' I figure, I'll take a break, walk the dog around the block, visit the park, have a smoke, take my time, no problem.
'And,' the Coordinator says, 'you have to pick up it's crap.'
DAVID: And?
KEVIN: And I said 'I'm not doing that.' And she says 'You have to do it. It's the law.'
DAVID: So? Did you do it?
KEVIN: I didn't. And here's why. If I pick up that dog's crap, I will be known for the rest of my life as 'the guy who is willing to pick up that dog's crap.' I am not that guy. Not for a dog that I don't know personally. If it was my dog, fine, that's the law in New York, you pick up after your dog, but I'm not picking up this spoiled puppy's doo doo, I don't want to be that guy.
DAVID: I don't blame you.
KEVIN: But that wasn't the best part. The best part was this other PA wannabe director was standing right behind me, the words weren't even out of my mouth, when he jumps in with 'I'll do it!' and goes off and happily picks up the agency dog's crap for the rest of the afternoon.
DAVID: No kidding.
KEVIN: They will always ask you to do something terrible, and the terribleness will expand exponentially until you draw the line. You draw the line too early, you're out of a job. You draw it too late, you have no soul left. Balance, Dave. It's the only way. ¶ 3:11 PM 0 comments links to this post
